Alligator Heaven
A True Story, With Embellishment
Dear Reader;
There is a story told in my family that when my father was a child, he came home from the CNE one day with a baby alligator. A man on the midway sold it to him and he was afraid that his mother would be angry so he hid it in the basement.
Now in those days my grandparents’ house was fuelled by a wood furnace that was downstairs in their leaky basement. Often there would be water on the floor, so the wood had to be kept stacked high and dry. One day my grandmother went downstairs to put some wood into the furnace to keep the house warm, but there on the floor in a puddle of water was a piece of wood, so she picked it up to keep it dry, but instead of a piece of wood, she picked up the baby alligator by the tail.
Those of us who are wise today can say in our knowing, an alligator has no place in a house. Not in a leaky basement, not anywhere else in a house. That alligator should never have been taken from the jungle that was his home. But here my grandmother was, with a baby gator by the tail, and the story goes, she screamed and dropped that piece of wood back into the water and ran upstairs to the kitchen wailing.
By the time my grandfather came home and was sent down to look for the wood floating in the water, it was gone. That alligator was somewhere in the house, but not where it had once been seen. The wood wasn’t just in the water, it could be anywhere, anywhere at all.
As a child, hearing this story from my father, I have little recollection of the outcome. I could guess at what happened. I could be right, and I could be wrong. But what I do remember is a dream I had after I heard the story, and that dream was as important as anything else that might be true.
In my dream, my grandmother gathered all the children in the kitchen. She had heard that alligators eat the toes of children, and maybe even more than just the toes, and so she gathered all the children in the kitchen, high above the leaky basement with floating wood. In the dream, she had told all the neighbours that what she thought was some lovely wood that would stoke the fire, turned out to be an alligator, and all the children could be eaten alive.
And so there in the kitchen came a great gathering. My grandmother was not going to let that alligator eat any toes. And in my dream, she stood tall and called upon the toys to protect them, and I watched as every toy in the house came alive and marched, one by one into the kitchen.
The toys had grown huge before my eyes, cowboys and Indians, wooden soldiers and dinky trucks, all began to fill the room. Soon there were so many, there was nowhere to stand. My grandmother was happy. She said this will show the alligator. He will see that no toes will be nibbled in her brave house.
By this time there were so many children and toys in the kitchen that they began to overflow into the street and now the neighbours came. Everyone was angry with the alligator, and there was so much fuss that someone called the police. Word on the street was, there was an alligator hunt in my grandmother’s kitchen, and the sleeping toys had come alive.
So now, all the coppers in town came running to my grandmother’s house and they began to wave their sticks and argue with the toys, telling them they had to behave. But what they didn’t realize was the magic was spreading. The very idea of an alligator was enough now to make all the toys on the street come alive.
Soon there were marching baby dolls and wind up spinning tops, and Aladdin with his lamp and even the sheep and the wise men from the nativity scene all were there. They filled the street until the police looked around and their faces began to smile. They couldn’t help themselves and soon everyone was laughing and singing together and shouting Alligator Go Home To Your Mother, may the river carry you safely away, no more wood floating in the water, no more children’s toes in danger here.
In my dream, I had never seen such a party. Never had I witnessed so many toys dancing in one place. But somehow, even in the midst of the madness I remembered that we still had not found the alligator. And when no one was looking I crept back into my grandmother’s house and went searching all by myself.
I floated in so quietly that no one noticed, and I peered in the hall closet, but no alligator was there. I ducked beneath the stairs, but no alligator was there. And then, ever so quietly, I went to the door of the big bedroom, which was closed ever so tightly. A big, golden key was right there in the lock. In that moment, the key, and the way in, were all mine.
I knew I was not supposed to be in that bedroom. This was a place only for my grandmother and grandfather. I knew it was where they traded secrets, and there were heavy curtains and huge, dark chests of drawers. There was a big bed with posts that rose all the way to the ceiling and perhaps this was the place where the secrets were traded. I wondered, perhaps the alligator wanted the secrets, and so this was where he had been hiding all along.
The room was dark and silent at first, as if all the lights of heaven had been turned off, but I told myself not to be afraid. And then I caught a glimpse of something moving on the floor, and sure enough, there were the teeth, there were the glinting pupils of a twisting alligator peeking out from under the bed, and with all the magic in the air he had now grown to be full size, just like the toys. His green eyes looked sideways at me as he began to slither forward, dripping jaws yawning open for a meal.
But the wonder of dreams is that, just when you think you have seen everything, something entirely new happens and it’s never what you thought it would be. So just when it seemed all was lost, the bedroom door burst open and toys I had forgotten about suddenly filled the room. These were the fierce toys, the gladiators, the warriors in their paint, the knights in their armour. No one knew where they had been hiding, but now the hiding was over and as they poured into the room they threw open the drawers and cupboards and do you know what they found? Baby alligators, all waiting to trade secrets when no one was home.
Not just one or two, there were dozens of these creatures. But the warriors had a great sack which was magic indeed, for as they roared through the room, none of the alligators were hurt, just simply whisked into the magic sack where they disappeared. And the now big daddy gator, who had been drooling under the bed, had a special sack just for him. It all happened so quickly I realized that no one had even noticed, because all the police were still dancing in the street with my grandmother, celebrating the children’s happy toes.
Now I wish I could say that in my dream I was able to follow those warriors with their magic. I wish I could tell you where they took all those gators, so they would never hurt anyone again. I do believe there is a kind of alligator heaven, deep in the hot rivers of the south, and I have heard there is a special river with banks so high that the gaters can never climb out, never make their way to my grandmother’s kitchen ever again.
But I do know that when I woke up from that dream, I understood that every toy has a purpose, and when we care enough we can be just like those toys, and grow bigger and bigger, big enough to stand tall, big enough to come together when we are willing to see what is really swimming in the basement, when all the family secrets are finally set free.
And just like every dream, it may be true, or it may be just a thought, a moment in time that will dissolve until the next one. But one thing I do know is that alligators are real. And there just might be one in your grandma’s basement too, if you dare to see what you dream.
much love, Adi
PS. My father really did come home from the CNE with a baby alligator, and my grandmother really did pick it up, thinking it was a stick of wood, and the gater really did get lost in the house. The remainder of these words I leave to dance in your imagination as you choose your reality in this ever-shifting world.
I share this story with gratitude for the delightful work of Mitchel Wu.
A creative dad brings family-favorite cartoon characters to life by putting them into hilarious situations. You would be forgiven for thinking that the images are created using Photoshop -- but, complete with real fire and coffee splashes, Mitchel Wu's images are all shot in real time. Using plastic toy characters from family-favorite films such as "Toy Story," "Star Wars," "ET" and "The Muppets," the California-based photographer puts the plastic characters into surreal situations. ~ The NY Post.
Such wonder, Adi. And the Mitchel Wu’s art and other photos add this adorable touch to capture a world I want to be a part of. Just a pinch of lizardry dust ✨
🙏